Across the Street, Pt 3

I went over again "empty handed."

I might have over-estimated how poor her health is, because she was not walking around without a cane today. She looked great, with color in her face and dressed and more clear-minded. (She's around maybe 50 years old, not that old.) Definitely an answer to prayer... with God I do not believe there are any coincidences. He is kind. She too was pleased that she was better today. So, I'll keep praying for her physical needs.

Once again I see how impure a witness I leave in the tracks. She complimented me on how good of a mother I am that I should have more than three. And, for some people, such a comment might be an attempt at small talk. But I could tell just from the way she said it that she absolutely meant it while observing me. And what did I do? Well I got uncomfortable so all I said was "thanks." Then I pontificated like I'm some expert... to a grandmother, none the less. I shake my head, I can see how arrogant I am. Everything in life right now is telling me that I am arrogant. I wish I could change. And that wish, I know, could be fulfilled if I was more willing to stand back and let God work. Which would require of me a closer walk with Him. Being still, and focused and in tune.

We got onto a topic of perspectives in raising children. She was so encouraging to me. She has all the same ideals for priority that I have set for my own life.... I mentioned that loving kids to model things "like faith," is so important. That's all I had the conviction to mention about "the gospel" for today, and that is enough. She mentioned "God" helping her with giving birth, a definite highlight....

The test I use on myself for how I'm doing to spiritually witness Jesus, whether or not it is with preaching, is this: who walked away feeling like a winner? Me, or them? Well once again today she made me feel absolutely awesome about myself. But how can I encourage her? That is the reason I am there, after all. Where is my head, Jesus? I mean, come on, Sanc. Get it together.

She said "I get too reclusive and the days pass along." I replied in honesty that I enjoyed her company for the same reason. We thought maybe we could get together tomorrow again, but I am expecting company. So we'll see where this leads, but as for this particular relationship, I'll blog whenever there is any developments. Just so I can see, I hope, over time, what God has done.