Some Crusty Thinking on Community

I've had this thought for a long time that it was my church's job to pull me into the church as much as possible.  I waited on them to create church events where I could be with them and build connection with them.  I needed the church to express all the intentionality in relationship toward me because my relationship energy was intentionally spent on bringing spiritual sojourners into space with me.

In the space I shared with these spiritual sojourners, cool things were happening.  They were blessing me and I was blessing them.  It was great for me individually to see God expand the church (by giving people eternal life, even if they never attended services).  I didn't want to work alone, so I depended on the church community to pull me into their world so that I could merge where I was with the sphere for which I was filled with passion.

come on, church community, pull! 

Yes my sphere in the world was getting "the church" from me individually as I am a part of Christ, but I knew they weren't knowing the blessing of the church as a family so they could see their own identity in God's grace toward them.  Sharing the gospel of course was most important.  Church community was always the secondary sell, not always as successful.  That left me feeling like I was always working mostly alone.  I was sad.  I didn't know how to say in words that I felt neglected.  If sojourners never made it all the way to church community, I just didn't see how I would ever get to enjoy fellowship at church without simultaneously downplaying the great commission.  It's a catch-22.

Now I think differently.

I was wrong.  The church community can be just as much invited into my space as my sphere.  Then wherever I am, the church community is also but much more naturally than scheduled church community events.

Why did I think the two spheres are separate??  They in no way have to be.  I guess it's just another consequence of thinking about the church as a location (the church is a building) instead of thinking of the church only as God's people (the church is believers wherever they are).

Seven months is how long it took to apply it personally.  I have been nodding my head at PAX all this time but now this really faulty thinking is starting to crack.  And I feel much better.  It's so much more simple now.  And a lot less painful.  I don't need to be pulled, I only need to invite.  I still flop like a fish a bit when I'm at PAX.  There's a lot of crusty thinking I've built up from years of not feeling sufficiently pulled.  I think I'm gaining critical mass.

I hope that if you're like me and you love to reach your world for Christ, you will feel helped by this testimony.

Choose Hate

We've heard Jesus tell us that we must hate our life to gain our life.  I thought I would write it down with a picture to keep it fresh.

I am so completely blessed!  I hope you can say the same about your life?  I respect my blessings and I am sure that I take most of them for granted.  In the grand scheme I know I don't deserve them.  But I do know they are on loan to me.  I've felt that way since I was saved.   

I believe God is inviting me to hate my blessings and accomplishments as Paul wrote in Philippians.  A blessed life is garbage compared to the surpassing greatness of something else: knowing Christ (more, better).  Is this a little too liberal?  Paul says that everything is garbage, not only the life he had before he was saved.

I've changed my approach to God in prayer.  There is nothing that is so desirable about my opportunities that I should keep accepting it as my only understanding of how to "know" God.  There's nothing I need to do today, so, God, do something Yourself.  Really, nothing, I wonder at myself sometimes?  Yes!

How has the LORD replied?  I see more of God's power.  I see Him doing things powerfully that I have always wanted to witness.  I want to keep regarding myself this way, because it is freeing.

I love God doing neat stuff.  It makes me want to love my life, and I do.  I like the theology I'm learning.  I like being needed, I like being necessary.  I like having the conversations I realize are going to be happening.  

I don't see the bad news for awhile.  There's this crazy little pattern of deviation from His plan that happens when I like my life: "sin and earth."  I call unintended deviations, "earth."  (I think the Bible calls this "worldliness.")  The earth is imperfect and filled with pictures of futility.  Even worse is when I intentionally include deviations, and I call these "sin."  Some examples are when I listen a little too much to life.  God commanded me to think big of Him.  

These elements of sin and earth get mixed in with God and His work, and it becomes a mixed bag.  I still believe that what He is up to is indeed good.  And He is still going to do it, but I believe He has to battle with me so that I can truly grow.  He blesses me, true.  I do not see God as much, but I do see His power sometimes.  Eventually the sin and earth quotient becomes too big and I say because I am forced, "I hate my life."

That I would choose from the outset the purity that "hate" affords.  Who doesn't adore life as His child, and I am no exception.  If I want to see God's pure power, the best choice?  Hate.