The assumption sometimes is made that if they do not listen, they must therefore be seeking to disobey God in their heart.
Paul had authority to speak for God. He said, "...when you received the word of God which you heard from us, you welcomed it not as the word of men, but as it is in truth, the word of God, which also works effectively in you who believe." 1 thess 2:13. Since then there has not been an equal authority for truth than those words of Paul (and the other apostles). The only way to put our message on par with Paul's is to only quote scripture and not interpret it.... There have been many teachers of the word, but they should not desire it so easily. What if there has been error? And we all know that all of us have said or taught error to those we speak with, at one time or another.
So, how can we tell a true message from a false one?
I don't think it's supposed to be easy. At least not when we use more than just scripture, but also our own words. I think it has to be up to each of us to hear the right in each other when in fact they do have something right.
Then, how we preach should be biblical as well:
"Nor did we seek glory from men, either from you or from others, when we might have made demands as apostles of Christ. But we were gentle among you, just as a nursing mother cherishes her own children. So, affectionately longing for you, we were well pleased to impart to you not only the gospel of God, but also our own lives, because you had become dear to us. ...that we might not be a burden to any of you...." 1 thess 2:6-9
Just because someone lacks gentleness when sharing their message does not automatically make it false, nor do messages that are gracious and patient mean they are true, conversely, either. But, it is a sobering thought, to remember Paul's instructions here that those who impart a message of truth, should do so with obvious affection and no burden to the listener....
And with all this improvement, the listener still might reject the message. Does this mean they are out of fellowship with God?
Could be. I know that Abraham was 75 when he first obeyed the Lord's voice, and 85 when he was deceived into bearing a child with a maid instead of his wife. Another thirteen years later God said, "You will have a son with your wife Sarah," and Abraham's reply was essentially "What about Ishmael? Isn't he good enough?" Some time later, Sarah heard the promise of God that she would have a son, and laughed, then denied laughing. What a big mess of deception, disobedience, and disbelief... at least in part. But did God abandon the work? God still called him "friend," and Abraham, though having many hiccups, walked with God by faith.
If you or I were looking at Abraham at any one year in his life, like we do our brothers and sisters in Christ, would we have seen all that God was working in him? Probably not. God does not look at the outward things like men do. He looks into the heart.
What if our brother in Christ is experiencing a hiccup? A laugh? A time to wonder "is this good enough?" They hear the Word now, but they can't really process it in a way where we will see the outward change, till much farther along.
In the meantime, should we second-guess their own profession that they're still walking by faith with Christ?
I've seen sensitivity on the part of all, even the beginnings of change according to pleas for righteousness. Even when there has been no movement, on some issues, they have at least clearly listened and considered; twice, three times, seven times....
The offense of the cross is this: there is no quick and easy fix. Obedience may be slow in coming. But, it just does not count if not borne out of faith. That is the Way of Christianity. Jesus fulfilled the law, and we grow in righteousness by faith in that alone.
We certainly do not want to put so much pressure on our brother that they feel obligation to obey us instead of God.
Obligation makes superficial obedience, which, when removed later on, proves general lawlessness.
Meanwhile we are disciples of a God who justifies ungodly people because there is active faith in Christ and what He accomplished at the cross.
We can't expect to have Paul's authority; that was a special, one time thing for those who were actually taught by Jesus Himself. But, God uses us and uses His Word. Should we use Satan-esque language for their disobedience to our message? Paul might have properly deserved the privilege to say such things. I'm not so certain it's right for us. Certainly, where there is error, it is the work of the enemy, but what believer hasn't learned to love studying scripture to put down that very threat? Errors are the work of Satan, to be sure; but perhaps not in the way we think; perhaps not all of the error belongs to the listener, alone.
I just assume that before I'd ever use the finality and negativity of damnation that comes by error, and the predictions of deprivation wrought from making mistakes, I ought to first use that language over myself. The wrong thoughts and deeds I have done. Have I ever erred? Have I ever made a wrong choice? What is the spiritual substance of my errors? Are mine not also the achievement of Satan? Of course they are. Am I as alarmist and public about my former mistakes (or, the mistakes I make today which I will see in twenty years)?
"Therefore you are inexcusable, O man, who passes judgment on someone else, for in whatever you judge another you condemn yourself; for you who judge practice the same things." rom 2:1
We all make mistakes but we are also all a work in progress. There are a few people amongst the believers who seek to cavort in a false form of godliness. Those people are the kind who do not honor the Word, take no correction from it, and give no defense for their actions. I'd like to say who I have in mind when I think of such men; if you read this, you're not that kind of guy. Special reservation for these are made for so much more than being stubborn or emotional in seasons.
The offense of the cross is this: we will not all be in conformity, outwardly. We are made blameless by walking with God, alone.
Paul says in Galatians 5:10-16
"I have confidence in you, in the Lord, that you will have no other mind; but he who troubles you shall bear his judgment, whoever he is. And I, brethren, if I still preach circumcision, why do I still suffer persecution? Then the offense of the cross has ceased. I could wish that those who trouble you would even cut themselves off!
For you, brethren, have been called to liberty; only do not use liberty as an opportunity for the flesh, but through love, serve one another. For all the law is fulfilled in one word, even in this: "You shall love your neighbor as yourself." But if you bite and devour one another, beware lest you be consumed by one another! I say then: Walk in the Spirit, and you shall not fulfill the lust of the flesh."
The world hates this message. It is offensive to the human way of being, to say that our righteousness in God should stand on something greater than our knowledge. It is offensive to the human way of being, to suggest that it's okay to not be obedient in all works, today, by claiming we have faith alone. It is offensive to the human way of being, to think that God might handle someone else's life a little differently than what we think we know is right. We all want power. A true leader will point others not to conformity, but to the authority of the Spirit in faith.
Our confidence was never in our own righteousness, our own understanding, anyway. There is nothing to fear when faith leads the way. It will deliver in due time.
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