Testify Again

There is another story from my past which I have not yet shared because it is slightly embarrassing, and because the post titled "My Testimony" is just a little bit too long for more.

Again, it testifies that God's grace is free to all who put their trust in Jesus.

When I was eighteen, a year after my experience of having received an immovable joy from praying to God through Jesus, I still knew hardly nothing. It is difficult to explain knowledge, sometimes, isn't it? For instance, I had watched the four-hour long story of Jesus' life and teachings two times, so I had heard the "truth," but as for my own ability to decide what I believed, I had no reason at that point to make up my mind.

Perhaps some of the things I observed about Jesus in the movie were there to encourage me in a greater faith for Him, when I became hard-pressed.

At this time in my life I was friends with a boy at lunchtime for a couple weeks. There was this other girl who also liked him. She was a trouble-maker, meaning she had a juvenile case worker who was allowing her to go to school and live back at home after a rough history of getting into fights. When she started coming around she told me to back off from him, and I said forget it, and I made fun of her. Then she realized that we both rode the same bus route home. On the bus she started telling people that at the end of the week, on Friday, she was going to beat me up when I got off the bus.

Great story, isn't it??

Well, I had been in a fight once before and I wasn't the kind to back down, but, my stomach just churned and churned for five days in anticipation. On day one, I decided to pray. I asked this God whom I was just beginning to know, "Can you make it so that, no matter what, she just won't have the opportunity to do it?"

I prayed that prayer. I sat for a day. On day two I wanted more assurance that God had heard me. (Don't we all do this?) So I prayed again, "God, I am trusting you to take care of me and stop her from doing this. I think this wold be pretty miraculous if you end up protecting me, and if you do it, well, that's pretty awesome."

I sat for a day. She still flaunted how she was going to beat me up on Friday. All the kids were listening to her. I was worried about it, the prayer, whether or not God was going to do this for my sake or if I was being too foolish in what I requested. So I prayed again, "Do I need to do something in order for you to do this for me? God, what would I have to do in order for you to think well enough of my request to do it?" That thought sat with me for awhile. I probably thought about all of the stories where Jesus healed people in the movie because they believed. I decided that this was an issue of whether or not I could trust Him. I almost abandoned the request because it was getting frustrating. Then I realized that if I were really trusting Him to take care of it, I ought to be able at least to give Him the credit.

So, I prayed, "God, if you do this for me, I will tell others that it is Jesus who is protecting me."

There -- that would really be a test to see if I was relying on God to protect me.

The day came. The bus ride was horrible. She had all the kids in a frenzy. She stood over me, yelling how she was going to beat me up. For the first few times I didn't say anything. The bus driver heard about it, and hadn't said anything yet but kept his eye toward the back of the bus. The kids asked her again and again, "Are you really going to beat her up?" And she said heck yeah. Meanwhile I remembered my prayer -- I was so stressed out I almost forgot about it, but, I realized that I needed to be public about Jesus. How embarrassing, I felt for a few minutes. But, in the last couple minutes of the ride home, I finally spoke up.

She said again, "I'm going to beat you up!"

And I said in a small, squeaky voice, "No; you're not."

"What??" she said. "Did you just say I'm not?"

"Yes... you're not going to do it," I said quietly but calmly.

"Oh really? Why's that??"

"Because," I said, pausing, "Jesus is going to protect me."

The kids around me got real quiet. Then one of them asked me, "What did you say?"

I sighed. I was embarrassed, but I thought it was just another test of faith. I resigned to raise my voice significantly louder and said, "Because Jesus is going to protect me."

Now the whole bus was silent. Everyone was perfectly still, including the girl, till I reached my stop. I got up to get off and stood there, and listened.... One of the kids asked her, "So -- are you going to do it?"

And as I was walking to the front I heard her say "Uhh, I can't. No, I can't, because I'll get in trouble with my case worker."

PHEW!

JESUS CHRIST IS A LIVING GOD!

Coincidence?? No way, not if God answers prayer. Now, He didn't have to save me. I still didn't believe in sin or that I was a sinner for another two or three years. I didn't believe that He is God as I do today. And I don't think it's biblical to go around claiming God will protect me from whatever I desire. But, I had faith in Him just as the kind of Abraham's, and because He is all-knowing, and He knew where I was in my relationship to Him, He blessed me with deliverance.

"And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him." Hebrews 11:6