When my pastor announced his leaving recently, it was like this; I went through a few days of involuntary recalibration. Doubt, over my place and my own beliefs. It isn't persecution, but it is a kind of suffering that happens when I realize I am the only one who believes and serves in the fashion I am. I go back to the Word of God. It eventually rescues me.
The doctrine that rescues me over and over again is sanctification by faith alone. I read Galatians and I realize that the truths in chapter three are the truths that not only affect my own personal peace in Christ but also the peace I might extend to others around me, as well as the difference in my theology in comparison to most every person I have ever known.
This latest period of doubt unusually found me thumbing through a book I purchased on the topic. I rarely pick up books on the topic of law vs. grace because they often disappoint, telling me things I already am enduring in the people I live amongst. This one was different; I bought it at the local free grace seminary because it was ordered as the text for the class titled, "Romans and Galatians."
In it [1], the material from chapter fifteen which is titled "Sanctification: The Wrong Way by Works of the Law," says of Romans 7:6 (one of my most favorite verses in the bible),
[Paul] could not say that the law dies. The law of God never dies. The Jews would have had Paul in a moment, had he said the law died. He says that we were made dead through the death of Christ. We died with Him, and that broke the relationship. That is the application.
But that is not the end. To paraphrase Paul, "You died to the law in order that you should be joined to another, that is, Him who was raised from the dead, so that you might be fruitful to God." And so, while some say this is a dangerous doctrine, that of being dead to the law, do not forget that there are two things that go together: first, freedom from the law; second, union with Christ. And that combination makes it safe!
There it is. I don't need an army of others who can say this. I just need one, maybe two or a handful of comrades, and I think I might remain fulfilled. I had forgotten I had skimmed to this chapter when I first bought the book in February of 2008. I remember that I'd read it, and then I knew that this group of people known as "free grace" could and would defend the truth found in the Word of God. Our victory in enduring obedience in Christ, is caught up in this teaching, I am convinced. The battle, is real. The goal, is worth fighting for.
WIth my methods, too, sometimes I can't seem to explain what I am up to, what my values are and how they are God-honoring. Yesterday though, out they poured. I got it out in words, again, thank the LORD!
A short conversation with JP at his blog.
Yes... I sometimes suffer with doubt.
[1] McClain, Alva J. Romans: The Gospel of God's Grace. Winona Lake, Indiana: BMH Books; 1973, pg. 153
7 comments:
Michele,
Wonderful post! Sometime I may share how teh Lord has & still does, get me through such periods as well. One such was so horrible it is hard to describe, but the Lord used it so amazingly that it still is a blessing today. Sorry to be so long-winded. More hopefully later. May the Lord bless you.
David,
You, long winded? I think not. I'd like to hear the story....
You encouraged me!
Michele
Thank you Michele, I appreciate it.
I won't go into the whole thing here, but I will say for now, that this doubt & depression lasted for months, & my precious wife suffered right along with me. Let me also say that I was pastoring a church at the time, & only by the sheer grace of God did we even make it through that time. I give Him all the glory & my wife great appreciation as well.
I also want to say, that though I'd never want to go through it again, yet I am thankful He took me through it, becuase he has used it many more times than once to help another struggler along the way, & precious texts such as 2 Cor.1:3-4 as well as Psalm 84:6 became even more precious through it! More later......maybe. May the Lord bless you, & thank you for your openness & honesty in the Lord.
David,
I was thinking about your story of your wife, and in my mind I hear "Great is Thy Faithfulness."
:)
That's what we ought to do for one another: love one another, be faithful to one another and see them through. Did the doubt come from not having others who believed as you?
I've read Ps 84:6 before, but I don't understand it very well, though I'm intrigued. Shh, don't tell anyone this, but I struggle with the OT.
;)
Michele
You're right, Michele, about my wife! She is my 2nd greatest blessing behind the Lord Jesus Christ & His salvation in my life!
Psalm 84:6 seems to be much like the picture of a weary traveler, making his or her way through a wilderness area. As he goes along, he decides to dig a well. That's all he can do, obviously he can't provide the water. But, God can & does! So that when another weary struggler comes along, there is fresh well-water to enjoy! That's the way I see it, anyway. We do what we can, & leave what we cannot up to God, which He does abundantly! The greatest joy of all may be in being used by Him to bless another! We can then genuinely empathize with them.
In my struggle back then, there were multiple causes almost for sure, but one of the worst was to hear preachers say things such as, if you can't remember the exact date of your conversion, you may not bne saved, etc etc. Now, it is no problem, but at the time, it was earthshaking, or more accurately, faith-shaking! Yet God brought me through! Praise HIS Name!
There's more, but that's sufficient for now. Thanks for your interest. God Bless!
David,
Psalm 84:6 seems to be much like the picture of a weary traveler, making his or her way through a wilderness area. As he goes along, he decides to dig a well. That's all he can do, obviously he can't provide the water. But, God can & does! So that when another weary struggler comes along, there is fresh well-water to enjoy! That's the way I see it, anyway. We do what we can, & leave what we cannot up to God, which He does abundantly!
Ahhh, that's beautiful.
What an encouragement to read this. Thank you!!! You just made my day!
Yes, I too find it difficult to endure bible-believing Christianity saying that if you can't see something in yourself, you may not be saved. I believe Kevin of On My Walk once said most effectively in my hearing, assurance is based on the promises of God. (I'm sure others have said it but I remember it firstly from him.)
I praise God for delivering you and all those under your care!
The LORD is a Shepherd,
Michele
Thank you Michele for your kind words. God is always so good to me, & all of His children! God Bless!
Post a Comment